Retreating to the Bathroom

I opened the bathroom door. They heard the door. FOUR of the NINE raced to see who could reach me first.

"Mom! Mom!" they shouted as they ran. A sudden cacophany of questions flew at me.

"Mom, can I have an apple?" (Take ten if it will make you hush!)

"Mom, where's my other shoe?" (I have no idea. In the alternate reality you just returned from?)

"Mom, the dog needs to potty." (Sorry...the bathroom is taken....oh wait....she said the dog....)

"Mom, please can I let dog out potty?" (This last is from Mary, who has a pretty good command of the English language even though she's only been in the country for a year and a half.)

Andrew (our little Russian Stink Bomb--what he calls farts) isn't quite as adept with the English language as his sister. You could tell he really had nothing to say....just ran with the crowd so he wouldn't miss anything, I guess. LOL.

Anyway, in amongst all the questions that immediately flowed from their lips (to which I actually replied, "You have a father. He is capable of answering questions. Go ask him!), Andrew obviously realized he needed to have SOMETHING to say to justify his presence at the bathroom door. So he held up his Hot Wheels car and said, "Mom? Ambulance?"

"Yes, Andrew....an ambulance would be very nice right now. It could give me a ride."

I don't think he understood the irony.
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